Session October 10, 2015

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"Everyone laughed at her when she spoke her mind, but that didn't deter Laura."
by RMAF

Every morning before work "Laura the Leaper" fueled her body with a quadruple shot of cocoa coffee, then she could leap and run like an energized deer. What  anyone said or did was so far below her when she was so high on quadruple caffeine. 

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"She wanted a new laptop but he insisted she buy a tablet instead."
by GS

They sat on the bench for hours arguing heatedly about current technology trends. She wanted a new laptop but he insisted she buy a tablet instead. Since she was no longer his little girl but a functioning, independent adult, his wishes no longer came with the power of the purse. It seemed almost a role reversal for the older generation to embrace the latest technology while the younger wanted to continue with accustomed patterns. They pondered if society in general was retrenching to post and maybe passé contraptions. She had recently purchased a turntable on which to play her long-forgotten vinyl, and had several friends doing the same. He couldn't imagine giving up the convenience of an MP-3 just to recover the depth of acoustic elegance, maybe because his hearing was also fading. 

Eventually she had to go to work and he had to meet his buddies for a shuffleboard competition played online. They had to do it in person since it was not yet possible to drink beer on the Internet. She said when she could do that with a tablet, she would get one!

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"Andrew lay down on the back seat of his car and fell asleep in five minutes."
by MD

Andrew lay down on the back seat of his car and fell asleep in five minutes. It was obvious the traffic jam was not going to clear up quickly. The bus directly in front of him was simply too large to fit under the rock. As he slept, he dreamed of the trip he would be completing (if the traffic jam ever cleared up) and the beautiful women he would be meeting. 

"Hey, you, sir! You must wake up!" It was the bus driver, alerting him to the cleared passage. Andrew moved to the front seat and settled himself behind the wheel. He started his car and put it in gear. As he gunned the engine, he heard a loud crack just above him. He glanced up at the overhanging rock, looming like a thundercloud. The noise grew louder, and then he noticed the dust particles raining around the car and coating it with a fine layer. 

The bus moved ahead and now it was Andrew's turn. Just as he stepped on the gas pedal, the rock broke loose with a mighty roar and a shower of pebbles. Once again, Andrew had escaped death, but his road was blocked and his life was paused. He lay down on the back seat of his car and fell asleep in five minutes.

http://bespokegrafiks.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/pellegrini-6.jpg (Pierre Pellegrini)

"Despite Natalie's graduate degrees in Oceanography and Medieval Literature, she could only find work as a Wal-Mart Associate."
by AD

Despite Natalie's graduate degrees in Oceanography and Medieval Literature, she could only find work as a Wal-Mart Associate - that was until she got an invitation to take a teaching assistant job at a Florida university. This was not exactly the job she was thinking about with her degrees but it was better pay than Wal-Mart. She packed her car and set out on her journey over several states until she found herself driving down a foggy road where the only thing she could see were branches of trees faintly through the fog. The sky was darkening and Natalie started to get the idea she had made a wrong turn...

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"Leelah brushed her teeth several times every day and carried floss in her purse."
by TNT

It was never revealed that Leelah brushed her teeth several times a day and carried floss in her purse. She had to, because she was the representative of a marshmallow company. She smiled at the photographers as she wore the huge marshmallow hat that the company made her wear to all events. 

Leelah really hated marshmallows and she would throw them out the window at the office in the high rise building at anyone who annoyed her. It really amused her to hit executives (especially bald ones) from the window. She hid behind the curtains and giggled.

Was Leelah ever caught doing these naughty, childish things? It really didn't matter because, after all, her daddy owned the company.

http://simplifythechaos.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/sjw0001.jpg?w=434&h=300

“Wanda and Barney fought all the time, and seemed to thrive on conflict”

by RC

Wanda and Barney fought all the time, and seemed to thrive on conflict, although neither really knew just when it had begun. Perhaps it started when Wanda wanted to go on separate vacations; perhaps it was their conflict over a choice of pets (Wanda had always and always loved Poodles, which Barney absolutely detested.

“Those mutts were only bred for one purpose,” he said once, “and that was for target practice.”

Whatever had started the never-ending series of fights, they felt now like they ought to be hosting a reality show, and the point had come where both of them were a little tired of it.

“I don’t know whatever possessed me to go to that minister with you,” Wanda said one morning. “I must have been temporarily insane.” It so happened that the wedding dress Wanda had worn had been hanging up on the back of the door for a long, long time now, as if serving as a silent witness of an intention to slip into it and go off looking for someone else. And now that moment had come.

“I’m going to get on my dress right now,” Wanda finally said, “And I’m going to look for someone more suitable as a partner.”

“You just go ahead and do that,” Barney shot back, a challenging look in his eyes.

He doesn’t believe me, Wanda thought. But I’ll show him. So Wanda immediately snatched the dress off the hanger and he went into the bathroom to put it on. A few minutes later, he was gone. 

“Wonderful,” Barney exclaimed. “Now I can buy one of those Russian Wolfhounds. He’ll do very nicely in Wanda’s place. However, there will be no arguments, darn it!”

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“They built the house themselves and lived in it for many years,”

by CC

They built the house themselves and lived in it for many years. Finally, though, Lucy lost the keys for the fiftieth time and Don told her, with bitter frustration, that he finally realized she did not actually like the house or want to live there, that her repeated losing of keys was a symbolic message to him that he was a lousy builder, that she really just didn’t like him, and that it was time to move on finally.

Lucy was shocked at first then she ran to the closet and pulled out the display of keys. “No no no,” she told Don, “you’re wrong. I’ve had to hide this from you, I’m so ashamed. I’m a key addict.”

“Don’t try to wiggle out of it,” he said sternly. “The message is loud and clear. We’ll sell the house and go elsewhere.”

“I love this house, Don, but I’m an addict, I can’t control myself. Can’t you see I never lost any of the keys? I hoarded them! I kept them in the closet! Can’t you see I’m not mad at you?”

“Of course you are, I AM a lousy builder, look at the light switches, they’re too far from the doors, and there aren’t enough outlets. But you never complain, you just lose keys!”

“I don’t lose keys! I haven’t lost a single key! They’re all right here!”

They looked at each other. “Well, Okay,” she finally said. “We’ll move. If it makes you happy.”

“It's what you really want,” he said smugly.