"When the cage door opened, the tiger leapt out and ran through the crowds."
by TNT
They had chosen the wrong venue for a circus - it was at the Bee Hive Motel. Of course the ring-master was drunk as usual. He staggered over the chairs and bumped into the cage. The cage door - not latched - opened, and a tiger leapt out and ran through the screaming crowds. When it was over not a soul was to be seen. Who knows where the tiger went? He had disappeared into the alley behind the motel. Well, I guess that's the end of our first circus act. Never to be repeated.
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by RMAF
The professor stood at the lectern until the entire class assembled and in the fantasy of his outward highly intellectual and lowly deviant inwart mind, he pushed each student off the roof of the campus clock and bell tower. Then he snapped back into reality. "If I do that, I will no longer get my exorbitant pay check." So he smiled to his assembled class and said, "Good morning my fine class, shall we begin this morning's lecture?"
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by CC
Cindy hated deep water but she loved whales. She went on every whale watching adventure advertised in the local papers, hanging back in the cabin until a whale appeared, at which time she would tentatively inch down the deck until she could see the whale. She loved whales because - ever since the motorcycle accident 5 years ago - she could hear their thoughts, and they fascinated her. She never knew why whales, but was glad she didn't hear the thoughts of ants or sparrows, which would drive her mad. Suddenly a baby whale corkscrewed up and out of the water. "Whee!" she heard it think. "I love this! Thank God I'm not a monkey this time!" Cindy, intrigued, stepped gingerly along the rail, holding tight. "Hey," she thought at the whale, trying for the first time to communicate. "What do you mean about being a monkey?" "Oh, hi," thought the whale. "I was trapped in a Banyan tree's roots once and feared them ever since. Do you see any Banyans around here?" "No," thought Cindy. "You chose well." "Damn right," thought the whale.
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by RC
"Don't say I didn't warn you," Blossom said. Snow White crept closer to the cup of cream. It looked perfectly delicious. What could go wrong? Last time, she had turned it over and it had run all over, even getting on her paws - yuck! It so happened that the little cottage sat next to the train tracks, and the 9:15 was due. Just as Snow White was about to lap at the cream the train roared by. The sound and vibration itself was enough, but Snow White also jumped. Up shot the cream out of the cup, and a good amount splattered her coat. What a shock! And double-yuck! It was all over!
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