Session January 26

http://www.123rf.com/photo_10854354_wine-tasting-in-a-vineyard.html

Their lives hung in the balance
by PV

Hildegard and Franz were proud this day. Years of planning, tending and even backbreaking work had resulted in two salubrious vintages. The piquancy of the two fit together like yin and yang. This important offering was viewed with gustatory delight by Inspector Gross in his tour of the magnificent vineyards along a sublime bend in the Rhine.

To the side stood Oscar feigning obsequiousness. His moment had arrived and only the Gods could sanction the revenge he desired. He knew it all well in his 20 years of service. Even now he couldn't remember just which glass he'd put the poison in. He smiled broadly at the three others. Their lives hung in the balance.

http://www.dailyinspiration.nl/mysterious-photography/

She tried her best to turn things around.
by CC

Philip had enjoyed being in the maximum security jail. It had been comforting, and for the first time in his life he felt he belonged somewhere. As his mood and outlook improved he grew so upbeat and optimistic that he received an early discharge as a model prisoner. Martha came to pick him up. She was happy at first, but when he refused to change his clothes and just lay on the couch with a sad face, she knew something was wrong. She tried her best to turn things around, but nothing helped - not beer-can chicken, Budweiser with chips or Monday Night Football. Finally she knew he needed to go back in. It was the only way. She cradled his head in her lap as she devised his next crime. The room went still around them. Was this a sin, she wondered? Then so be it. She felt a surge of conviction.

http://misslottiecc.wordpress.com/odd things

i

Footsteps in the Dark
by GS

The fight had been over quickly. Jake's extra weight proved decisive so Buff just lay there in resignation, knowing he had again been overwhelmed by his large eldest son. "I'll probably be stuck here until dinner," he thought, remembering his last humiliation. Jake sat quietly now that his status had been reaffirmed. No need to waste energy on a fallen opponent after all!

Then they both heard footsteps in the dark, footsteps not at all familiar. Instantly, Jake jumped up into fighting mode and Buff quickly joined him. Now that an external threat loomed, they were completely focused on it and had no further need to fight each other. When the door opened they both attacked the stranger immediately. No trespasser had ever survived their combined efforts, and their perfect record remained intact once again.

http://www.piculous.com/weird-hairy-people/

We were forced to visit another powerful shaman in the town
By RMF

We were forced to visit another powerful shaman in the town because the prayers of the first one worked too well - now we need a different shaman to reverse our prayers. We prayed that Gertrude Agnes Olivia, who was going bald, would receive more hair. We never imagined our prayers would work so fast and so well.

http://npac.ca/?p=6129

Things were not as they seemed; someone was keeping secrets
by TT

Celtic Morning -No Coffee.
When the Romans left, the Celts were wandering around lost. Now there was no-one to revolt against, no-one to blame but themselves, no-one to petition or trick. It was awful. Would they have to go back to being barbarians again? But things were not as they seemed, someone was keeping secrets, like who gave the Druids the luxurious Roman spa? No-one was able to remove that dumb sword inside the stupid rock. There were no heroes in Britain.

Session January 12 2013

http://www.funzug.com/index.php/unusual-things/most-unusual-trees-ever.html

A bizarre creature met the launch upon the Beach.
by LD

It isn't a tree! It is a tree!  "I am so tired of your constant attitude of authority," said Mikey, the huge brother of two very threatening gorillas.  Telepathy seemed so silent to human ears, but to the big courageous mammals of the wild there was a very loud argument coming from the jeep the two had decided to sit in after running the 2 safari hunters off into the jungle to search for cellphone service. Suddenly a bizarre creature that could not be real met the launch upon the beach. "It is a mirage," yelled Mikey, the gorilla. "You're an absolute unadultereated idiot." Silent and serene was the tree and the countryside beyond  - themes in the telepathic waveform of communication between animals.



http://www.flixya.com/blog/21882/Unusual-photos

At that moment I should have left. by PV

But this was 1942, and the stop sign was the wrong shape. Where did she bank wrong in the sky corridors? The way before had been festooned with draped memories - someone else's - not those of her own aerie. They were the ossified remnants of avian memories, holding their own until time's arrow reduced them to clouds of dust. But this was new - she had escaped the tethers of the barrage balloons, the thudding ack-ack guns, and had been headed for the creamy cliffs of Dover and a nest with a view. It was light beyond the sign- she could have succumbed to despair - but I wanted to see more, to see what she would do, my links to her fading. At that moment I should have left.

http://theberry.com/2010/02/11/these-beds-are-anything-but-ordinary-20-photos/out-of-the-ordinary-beds

Lester was born with two left feet and two right hands.
by GS

Lester was born with two left feet and two right hands. At first life was quite difficult, especially when he needed to buy shoes, but he learned to cope. To compensate for his differences he designed an elegant living space that was both simple and comfortable. The large cylinder, which contained his bed, had started out as a window display case in an upscale store which went belly-up in the economic disaster, so he got it cheaply. He spent his time meditating in his bed with his two left feet tucked under his knees, his misplaced right hand in his robe so that casual visitors never even noticed his abnormalities. Not knowing what to do with his life he decided to ponder the state of the world until he could offer solutions to intractable problems. He died unfulfilled at an early age.

http://elenahendrickson.com/cats.html

Ludwig was branching out, no longer satisfied with the status quo.
by TT

All eyes were fastened on Ludwig. His audience was riveted by his long whiskers and tail and his painted claws. He didn't notice them until he had eaten half the cheese - the limburger - and looked up. He was satisfied that he had their complete attention. It was good that he had the cage between himself and them. Ludwig was branching out, no longer satisfied with the status quo. He thought he'd put the cat treats closer and it amused him to see their faces.

http://hd-desktop-wallpapers.blogspot.com/2011/01/winter-fantasy-winter-background.html

My father used to tell me
By UV

My father used to tell me stories about the journeys he took to Alaska and the big bright moon shining through the trees glistening on the snow. He said you could almost reach out and touch it. My Father told about a time when he was on his way to his cabin and you could see the silhouette of an elk in the moon. He told me stories of his life at the cabin in Alaska, hunting and fishing, and his strolls through the woods as a young boy. I enjoyed the stories. My dad is long gone now. I visit the cabin often. One night I looked up and saw the silhouette of my dad and his dog in the moon. Now I tell my children stories about the cabin in the woods

http://www.auto-broker-magic.com/funny-car-pictures.html

The first cut is the deepest
by CC

Al and Ben stood in the snow hole where they had laboriously excavated their Ford Explorer. Al rested on his shovel while Ben pocketed the spoon he had been using. "You shouldn't be so tired, then, Ben," said Al. "I think I did most of the dang work."  "No, siree," said Ben. "I did just as much, working a lot faster."  "But I worked harder," said Al. "No, I worked faster, " countered Ben. "You little creep!," shouted Al, "I did all this work while you just flipped your little spoon around!" "Why, you jerk! The first cut is the deepest" shouted Ben, scraping his spoon across Al's cheek. As Al raised the shovel, Ben jumped in the Explorer. Al began to shovel snow back over the car while Ben started the engine. He believed in the power of the spoon, and began rocking the car gently forward and back in the snow.

http://askville.amazon.com/Rocketeer-Question-Have-folks-notice-strange-pods-growing-neighborhood-acting/AnswerViewer.do?requestId=70191605

I call it a spiritual odyssey, a kind of missioinary voyage
by AD

I call it a spiritual odyssey, a kind of missionary voyage for the truth of one's self. I left my family and my home to find the truth of myself, who I am. I traveled to many places over the world and had many battles like one over a banana with this monkey on a pirate ship, and my most recent battle with the bloodthirsty killer Shamu. If I didn't go to jail for 5 years he would have fed me overseas for many months. I've also made many enemies and am a wanted man in many places in Japan for the way they say I offended the Buddha and Sumo wrestlers and when I broke a sword on the last samurai. In American I fell on top of the First Lady and placed her in a coma. There were many hardships too like whenI was in a forest in Wales and used poison oak as toilet paper. Or on the sea, I had water everywhere and a glass of it to drink. I am now standing in the middle of New York City playing an ancient tune and doing a spiritual dance, and have realized the truth I searched for about myself: I am a crazy fat man and am making a huge fool of myself. Tomorrow on You Tube you will see a fat guy in his underwear dancing and playing a funny song on a weird flute.